Lauren Through the Turtle-Pond

Lauren had been trying to finish her Shakespeare essay for two hours now, but she wasn't getting anywhere. She lay listlessly by Turtle Pond, gazing into the water and watching a turtle basking in the sun on the top of the log. "I envy you, Turtle" she said as the turtle moved his head a little and adjusted himself in the sunlight. "It must be nice to just lie in the sun all day. You must think all of us are a little silly, running around campus on our way to class, bringing our work to do by your home." The turtle blinked both eyes. "Do you know what to-morrow is, Turtle?" (Carroll 138) asked Lauren. "It's registration. I have no idea what to take. There are so many classes! How do I figure out which ones to take? I don't know how I'm ever going to graduate!" cried Lauren, searching for a little sympathy from the turtle. The turtle blinked its left eye and continued to sit on the log. "Every body else does it, so it isn't impossible. It's just that it's so complicated," she continued, "and I am so tired, and I can't even finish this paper." The sun was beating down very warmly, and the turtle seemed to be enjoying it very much. Indeed, Lauren's eyes were feeling very heavy, and the more she tried to think about Shakespeare, the more she wanted to fall asleep.

Suddenly Lauren awoke with a start. A small noise had sounded right next to her ear, and she turned her face to see the turtle slowly crawling by. He walked over her essay as he passed her, and the first page stuck to his foot. "Hey!" cried Lauren, "I need that!" The turtle dragged the page behind him as he continued on towards the pond. Lauren groggily got up and walked after him, trying not to move too quickly and startle him. He got to the edge of the pond, turned back to stare at her for a moment, then slid into the pond, the paper following him underwater. "Oh no!" Lauren cried, "It's going to be all wet! Mr. Krueger won't like that at all." She leaned over the edge of the pond, peering in at the sinking turtle. She reached out her hand into the pond, trying to grab the page, but it was just beyond her grasp. She leaned out a little more, and then splash! she fell right into the pond, splashing duckweed onto the sidewalk. Underwater, she could see the turtle swimming slowly away, into darker and darker water. "How deep does this pond go?" Lauren thought to herself as she swam after the turtle. After swimming for what seemed like a few minutes (and strangely, without running out of air) the water lightened, and Lauren could see sky. She broke the surface of the water as the turtle was climbing out of the pond and setting off again in the grass. "Oh for heaven's sake," said Lauren, dragging herself out of the pond, "all of that swimming was for nothing." But it wasn't exactly for nothing, for this didn't appear to be the same turtle pond, and even though the turtle was heading for the greenhouses, they didn't seem to be the same greenhouses as she was used to, for these were on the top of a hill. Nevertheless, Lauren needed her essay, so she made her way after the turtle towards the greenhouses. "I've always wanted to go in there" she remarked as she reached the door. "Only the door is locked every time. Perhaps Turtle-Pond greenhouses are open." To her delight, she turned the handle and the door swung open, though she had lost sight of the turtle.

Lauren wandered down the humid aisles of vines, cacti, and ivy, stopping in front of a beautiful potted ficus. "What a lovely ficus!" she remarked. "Oh thank you, I'm quite fond of it myself," said a small voice near her ear. Lauren was quite startled and stared at the plant, trying to see if it really had spoken. "Excuse me?" she asked politely. "I said I was quite fond of it myself. I usually take my tea in it. Quite comfortable, really," said a tiny chameleon perched on a branch next to Lauren's head. Lauren was very much startled, but she tried not to show it. "Oh, pardon me, I didn't know you could talk," she stammered out. "Only I've never heard a chameleon speak before." The chameleon turned her right eye to stare at Lauren. "It isn't manners for us to begin, you know," (Carroll 157) she said delicately. "Are you a friend of the Graduate?" "Who?" said Lauren. "The Graduate – I'm afraid I don't know her name, you see, she never properly introduced herself. She takes care of the plants." Lauren had no idea who the chameleon was referring to, but she would like to meet this person. Perhaps if they had already graduated then they could tell her how they did it. "I suspect she will be by very shortly; it's almost time for my tea," the chameleon added, turning the left eye to gaze down the aisle in the direction of the door. With that, the door opened, and in bustled a tall woman with glasses who was wearing burnt orange robes and a tasseled hat. Lauren started to ask her a question, but she hustled off around a hibiscus. Lauren followed after her, but as she turned the corner all she saw was the edge of the robes swishing past a fern at the end of the aisle. "This is ridiculous," thought Lauren, "I can't keep up with anyone around here," and she sank down on the floor. Moments later, the woman whisked around another bend of foliage and came to a halt right next to Lauren. "Excuse me, but what are you doing here?" the woman asked in a rather stern tone. "I only wanted to see what the greenhouse was like, miss – " (Carroll 161) Lauren stammered, but the woman's face softened. "When you say 'greenhouse' – I've worked in labs, compared with which this would be a petri dish" (Carroll 162). "Is it true that you've graduated?" asked Lauren suddenly. "If you wouldn't mind, could you perhaps tell me how you did it? As I'm very confused about what to do..." The woman beamed proudly, straightened her robes, and said "Why, I would be honored. You see, I graduated, and now I have this-" she dug around in her robes and flourished a piece of paper in front of Lauren's face – "that says I have a V.S. in Science!" Lauren was a little confused, because the piece of paper appeared to be some sort of map. "What exactly is a V.S. in Science?" she asked. "It means I'm Very Smart in Science – you must be a first year. Come with me." The woman rushed out the greenhouse door, Lauren following close behind in order to not lose her again. When they stepped outside, Lauren was met with a view she had not seen on the way up. Stretching far below the hill in every direction lay the campus, crossed as far as she could see by neatly trimmed hedges, running every so often right into buildings. Little (from the view on the hill) people were scurrying throughout the spaces made by the hedges, walking in and out of buildings, throwing Frisbees to people on other paths, and napping in the shade of the bushes. "I declare it's marked out just like a large hedge-maze!" Lauren said at last (Carroll 163). "Is this the campus? But it's so huge? How do I know which paths to take?" The V.S. smiled pleasantly at Lauren. "My advice would be to take the paths that you haven't been on before – that way you will know which ones are right." "But how will I ever choose one to start on?" cried Lauren, staring at the maze of green stretching for what must have been at least forty acres. "Well, reading will help you there," said the V.S. She dug around in her robes and produced a dozen or so books. Lauren started to open one and flip through the pages, but the V.S. shouted "Faster! Faster!" and the pages started flapping by at a tremendous speed, some tearing free from the binding and swirling around Lauren's head. More books came flying out of the V.S.'s robe and soaring towards Lauren until she was entirely buried by the mound of flapping books. She could barely breathe for a moment, then the books started to disappear – Lauren found herself down in the maze, and a man with a white beard and flowing, tie-dyed robes was picking the books out of the pile and flinging them over the hedges. "You don't need to read any of these," he said with a chuckle. "No imagination, those writers have." "Oh, thank you," Lauren said as she stood up. "May I ask who you are? You have graduated already; you must have read them yourself." The man smiled. "You don't have to read those to graduate – that's what the Very Smart people in Science will tell you. But if you want to become a V.A. of Literature like me, there is a whole other way of getting through the maze." Lauren was intrigued; the Meteorology book had left a large bump on her head. "What's a V.A.?" she asked. "That means I am Very Aware of Literature," he said seriously. "But what I am also aware of is the best way around this maze. Follow me." He took a few steps down the path, then suddenly turned and dove straight through a large hedge. Lauren peered through the hedge where he had disappeared, but what other choice did she have? She took a deep breath and jumped through.

She splashed down in a rocky creek surrounded by trees and bushes. The V.A. was a few yards away, peering intently at an impression in one of the rocks in the creek bed. "Is this the way to get to the end of the maze?" she asked him. "The way," he replied after a moment, "is to go whichever way looks the most interesting. They all eventually lead to the end of the maze." Lauren thought about this for a moment. The V.S. had told her to take the way she hadn't been, but the V.A. told her to go the way that she was interested in. Wasn't this really the same thing? She was really interested in the places she hadn't been yet. Maybe both ways were the way to graduate? Lost in thought, Lauren realized she had wandered her way back to the Turtle Pond, and the V.S. was sitting by the water, talking animatedly to the turtle. "Hello," said Lauren to the pair. "Have you finished your reading already? How did it go?" said the V.S. "The V.A. told me that I didn't need to read them – he showed me a way around the maze," said Lauren timidly. "Oh, those Literature Awareness types," she scoffed, "they always think they are being so clever about things. Do you know that I grew that maze for my thesis? Oh, well, as long as he keeps himself interested. I do hope I have been some help?" she ended, looking up hopefully at Lauren. "Yes, actually you have been a big help," Lauren smiled, "and I would like to thank – " But just then Lauren slipped on the edge of the pond, and with a splash! fell into the water, splashing duckweed all over the V.S. and the turtle. Sputtering, she stood up and pulled herself out of the pond. Looking around, she realized that she was back at her own Turtle Pond. The first page of her Shakespeare essay was laying on top of the rest, a little wet footprint soaking the title, and the other students lying on the grass were giving her strange looks. "Um, lab research," she mumbled, and they nodded and returned to their conversations and naps. The turtle blinked its right eye and shifted around in the sun.