Cat and Elephant
The humans act as if my life is over. They think I cannot understand them, but I do. The way they look at me through the bars of my cage with eyes full of pity tells me more than they realize. I can recognize their feelings, emotions, glances and posture, just as well as they could recognize mine, if they tried. But as soon as I feel true connection with a human, he severs it. I now know that humans believe they are separate and superior, as if one animal on the planet could possibly be better then another. It took me years to understand them and now that I do, I am disappointed. They ignore many of their natural abilities out of perceived excellence and miss opportunities to connect with the spirits they blindly pass each day. They miss the Òform of nourishmentÓ which is the Òjoy of compassionate expressionÓ[1]. It is nourishment all living creatures need.
As I said, I have had quite a long life, but I do not view it as coming to an end. I live with the fact that people walk through our shelter every day, ignorant to the number of true souls they face, souls in different forms, different bodies. I must accept that most humans view us this way, but in my twelve years, I have been lucky enough to come into contact with some of the others. Those who walk with the ever-changing aura; when they look at me, they pierce through to who I am, where I have been and what I have seen. I try to do the same. For this is the only way two souls connect. Once it is done, once a soul is recognized as important – as a life – it strengthens and grows.
My bones are tired and my fur is not as beautiful as it once was, but my soul is strong. Aging means the exchange of physical ability for experience and hopefully, wisdom. This is not only mandatory for all spirits, but also necessary. I am proud of my worn appearance and demeanor, for I have lived a good life. I was born not far from the shelter and scrounged for food for the first few years of my life. I came into the world a blank slate, as everyone does. The wisdom I have gained allows me to recognize this now. My earliest memory, or scratch on my slate, was of my motherÕs warm body. The humans think we do not have memories, but her warmth resounds in my soul. I remember. I was separated from her and my brothers and sisters weeks after being born. We lived weeks in the dark until we gained enough strength to open our eyes, only to be found and separated by humans. Despite its cloudiness, I will hold this experience in my heart forever.
Pumpkin eyes me as I enter his home.
The humans I watch take so many fundamental parts of life for granted - the connection between souls, appreciation of the natural world, their abundance of nourishment and shelter. But the rest of the animal kingdom was given different gifts than the humans - gifts that now create a deep divide between us. I will never know the experience of peering through human eyes but over my years of observing them, I know we interact with nature in different ways. I can smell each distinct flavor of my food, see the spectrum of blue in another catÕs eye and feel the weight of the air on my whiskers. Sitting here now, I watch a human stare blankly at a machine of some sort, completely disconnected from what is going on around her. They have to work so hard to tap into the senses we employ with ease, and usually forgo any attempt to truly connect before progress is made. It is difficult to understand, and even more difficult to explain.
And this is another fundamental difference I find between a human and myself – how I think is directly related to how I feel. My intuition is my guide. The forces acting within me are what push and pull me to act each and every day. The humans fight these forces within themselves and resist their intuition. I cannot imagine the internal struggle this may cause. It is the fight I see immediately after I feel a connection. Their souls are so entrenched in dilemma that their ability to connect with each other and the natural world we all live in is increasingly obstructed. I do not know how to save them, but I will continue to try.
I gazed through the bars at the Town Lake shelter - a human - trying to bounce my aura off each cat like a dolphin would use its echolocation. But instead of attempting to locate each physically, I attempted to connect with each emotionally. Most of the cats were napping or focused on something other than the human trying to ÒecholocateÓ them. I looked up to find a quite handsome, orange cat staring at me as if silently trying his hardest to communicate. It was at this moment, I felt the importance of practicing sympathetic imagination. I will never know what was going on in the mind of this gorgeous animal but the act of becoming him alone, has changed me. I tried to imagine what was important to him, not only emotionally, but also genetically. Our genes drive more of our actions and thoughts than we realize, so how do ours differ? He interacts with the world in a different way than I do. I hesitate to call it simpler because I do not believe it is. I believe it to be more innate. The development of the pre-frontal cortex in humans allows us, or forces us, to think about the future - weigh each and every decision and the impact it will have on our lives. As far as we know, cats have neither this part of the brain nor this ability, but this does not mean they are simpler. I felt the heat of his stare and knew he was trying to connect with me in some way. The experience reminded me of the last stanza of ÒThe PantherÓ we read in class. Rilke wrote:
Only at times, the curtain of the
pupils
lifts, quietly--. An image enters in,
rushes down through the tensed, arrested
muscles,
plunges into the heart and is gone.[2]
At that moment, I felt that this catÕs curtain had lifted for me and I was to appreciate whatever it was he was trying to communicate to me. Some image or thought was there between us and I wished wholeheartedly it would not plunge back into his heart and disappear.
I watched him and felt my heart expand in my chest, through my limbs and out of my body. The words of Adam Smith circled in my head. ÒAs we have no immediate experience of what other men feel, we can form no idea of the manner in which they are affected, but by conceiving what we ourselves should feel in the like situation.Ó[3] At first I found it difficult to shed my ÒhumannessÓ, but once I started thinking of the basic differences between Pumpkin and I, it was easy. I tried to recreate his heightened sense of smell, sight and touch. Although I could not truly acquire the abilities, I imaginatively explored the experience. What would it be like to have whiskers alert you to your surroundings? Humans will never know. I imagined my blue eyes were his green ones and I was his size instead of my normal six foot self. How huge I must have looked. While I pet him I watched how he reacted and tried to feel his being, tried to feel how his soul responded to my hand on his fur. I emphatically believe that any animal, be it human or cat, has the same capacity for love and compassion. If I am only beginning to understand these abilities within myself, has Pumpkin, at his old age, mastered them? Does he feel warm and energized at the thought of love the way I do? How do his genetics govern his actions? How does hunger feel to him? Does sadness manifest as a pit in his stomach they way it does in mine? Once the floodgates opened, it was hard to stop the flow of questions now surging through my mind. By clearing my mind for the half hour I spent with Pumpkin, I received an invaluable gift of humility. I am just one soul on a planet of trillions – be it human or animal - and each has the capacity and desire to love. As I found my center once more, I vowed to remember my bond to Pumpkin. I pet him once more, trying to transfer my gratitude through touch, and said goodbye.
Pumpkin connects with me.
Above is a still shot of the video included in my original blog.
WORD COUNT WITH QUOTES: 1486
WORD COUNT WITHOUT QUOTES: 1423
IMPROVE: Word Choice, Conciseness, and Punctuation
ALL IMAGES AND VIDEO BY AUTHOR.
Original URL: https://courses.utexas.edu/webapps/portal/frameset.jsp
APPENDIX
A. Screenshot of PumpkinÕs Biography on the APA website
B. PumpkinÕs Biography
Hello there, my name is Pumpkin. Although I am older than most of
my friends here at the shelter, I have just as much personality and love, if
not more. I am known for being sweet and caring. I have had a long life at
almost twelve years old, but am lucky enough to be in great health. I am quite
fond of my fluffy orange coat and love for it to be pet or combed. You can
usually find me at the top of our enclosure; keeping an eye on the rest of the
cats I share my home with. I am a noble leader and loyal friend. I absolutely love
people and conversation, but also enjoy curling up on your lap for a relaxing
nap or engaging read. I pride myself on my intelligence and alertness; I like
to know as much about my surroundings as possible. I am a kind and patient
teacher and love to socialize with other cats of all ages and backgrounds as
well as people. I love making friends with kids and my super soft coat was made
for being held and rubbed! I am sweet and playful and canÕt wait for you to
dangle a mouse or feather my direction. I do prefer being able to spend time
inside with you as well as indulge in my wild side while prowling outdoors. I
am a clean cat but favor taking care of my business outside, privately,
although I would never turn down a litter box. I know I will be an excellent
addition to your family and we will be inseparable soon enough. My birthday is
next week, adopt me and letÕs celebrate it together!